Today, remind yourself: You are a mothafuckin' badass, Caulfield. You are a bad girl to the bone. You live without regrets. You don't need a shit job, crazy people, boring boys, bad sex. Fart in your office. Steal the Kleenex. Post your resume nonstop and get out of this insane work environment with people who bring you down. You are a BAD GIRL. You've got all the charm, wit, and wisdom to make it in this world.
Don't forget to be humble. Don't forget to, eh, in blank terms, not be a little shit. But holy christ, hear you roar. You've got it all, girl. So get what you want, and don't let anyone hold you back.
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